Sacred Sex FAQ


Everything you wanted to know,

But were afraid to ask

For more information or questions, e-mail 4freedoms@tantra-sex.com or visit www.tantra-sex.com.

Table of Contents

  1. What Is Sacred Sex?
  2. Where did Sacred Sex begin?
  3. How common is Sacred Sex practice in North America?
  4. Is Sacred Sex a religious movement?
  5. What are some of the benefits of Sacred Sex?
  6. What kinds of activities do we participate in during the workshop?
  7. Do I have to take off my clothes in your workshops?
  8. Is there any sexual activity in class?
  9. Do I have to "bare my soul" to everyone?
  10. If I choose to practice Sacred Sex does that mean I have to stop having sex the way I'm accustomed to?
  11. What if my partner doesn't want to attend the workshop with me?
  12. What if I'm gay or lesbian?
  13. What if I'm not in a relationship right now?

QUESTIONS & ANSWERS

What Is Sacred Sex or Tantra?
Sacred Sex is a way of life that celebrates and strives for the union of spirit, mind and body. It is a spiritual discipline that uses one's sexual energy to achieve wholeness and transcendence. The main difference between Sacred Sex and other paths of spiritual growth is this focus on using sexual energy.

Many people experience occasional, spontaneous moments of "oneness" or a feeling of blissful union with their partner, with nature, with the Divine during peak sexual experiences. With practice you can learn to consciously create this rapturous spiritual union.

But, sacred sex is not confined to the bedroom; it is a full way of life that celebrates and strives for the union of spirit, mind and body. We've all experienced ecstatic moments, times when we feel totally connected : an athlete who goes through "the wall"; a parent at the birth of a child; becoming lost in a sunset, a piece of music, nature's beauty. By cultivating the joy of your senses and harnessing your sexual energy you can begin to live every moment ecstatically.

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Where did Sacred Sex begin?
Using sexual energy for spiritual awakening has been practiced for at least 5,000 years. The most well-known form is Tantra, which has its roots in Hindu and Buddhist practices of India and Tibet. Similar practices have been developed over the years in China (Taoism), Persia and among East Asian and North American aboriginal peoples. Fundamental to this belief system is that the union of masculine and feminine principles (the opposite forces in all creation - yin & yang, yab & yum) will result in transcendence. Sexual union, the physical manifestation of these yin and yang principles through men and women, is then one way to achieve union with God.

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How common is Sacred Sex practice in North America?
The concepts of Tantra were first introduced to the west in the 1800s by British scholars and travelers to India. More recently, a Tantric revival by gurus and teachers in the ashrams of India during the late 1960s has led to a popularization of these practices in Europe and North America. Now, Sacred Sex is fast becoming the sexual learning of choice for North Americans who want to have both a passionate sex life and spiritual growth.

Sales of Tantra books have skyrocketed, increasing by more than 30%. Tantra.com, an online Tantra resource, gets more than 50,00 hits per day. Celebrities like Sting and Woody Harrelson swear that Tantra has revitalized their relationship. Popular magazines, like Time and New Woman, have featured articles on spiritual sex practice.

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Is Sacred Sex a religious movement?
No. Sacred Sex is part of an individual's spiritual journey that is non-denominational. There is guided instruction, encouragement to welcome the Divine into your life, and close connection with others on the same path, but it is not a replacement of whatever your current religious affiliation may or may not be.

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What are some of the benefits of Sacred Sex?

  • Personal spiritual growth: greater connection with your Higher Self and God (or your name for the Divine - Higher Consciousness, Goddess etc.)
  • Better, stronger relationships: with your mate and with others in your life (parents, children, friends)
  • Improved health: more energy, stronger uro-genital system (helps with prostate difficulties, menstrual problems, etc.)
  • Increased self worth
  • More emotional balance
  • Ecstatic sexual experience: longer lovemaking, more desire, multiple orgasms, bliss states
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What kinds of activities do we participate in during the workshop?
Sacred Sex is about opening the body, the mind and the heart to allow for spiritual transcendence. So in our sessions we work on all three.

  • Body: "Passion's Pump" - a breath and muscle contraction technique for moving sexual energy
    Sexual skill - ejaculation control, types of orgasm, tongue exercises, thrusting methods
    Body movement - dynamic meditation, dance
    Awakening your senses
    Acupressure
  • Mind: Meditation and visualization
    Absorption: Learning to immerse yourself in experience
    5 Step Process for transforming relationship conflict into self learning and growth
  • Heart: Exercises for opening to trust
    Celebrating our Higher Selves - ritual, dance, sound
    Emotional release
    Play
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Do I have to take off my clothes in your workshops?
No. You don't have to take off your clothes. For most of the session you should wear light, loose, comfortable clothing that you can move freely about in. For our Saturday evening celebration bring clothes that you feel special in, that celebrate and express the essential you.

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Is there any sexual activity in class?
No. There is frank discussion about sex, about the human anatomy and how we function sexually. We also teach specific techniques for heightening sexual pleasure. You are given detailed instructions on how to develop and use these skills, but we do not practice them in class.

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Do I have to "bare my soul" to everyone?
No. Although we do have stimulating and intimate discussions about sexuality and spiritual and personal awakening you do not have to participate in anything that you do not want to. We encourage you to listen to your Inner Guide, the voice of your heart, to help you decide what to do. Any growth, however, requires the courage to risk and so we also invite you to step outside your regular comfort zone, to dare to allow your glorious Higher Self to emerge.

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If I choose to practice Sacred Sex does that mean I have to stop having sex the way I'm accustomed to?
No. One of the common myths we have about change is that it means giving something up. Instead change is an "addition to" - more skills, more understanding, more experience on which to draw as you make your choices for how you live and love.

In Sacred Sex we learn new skills and options for our sexual life. We come to understand for instance, that ejaculation and orgasm in men are not the same thing, that men and women are capable of many types of orgasm. Once we have the skills the choices are up to us!

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What if my partner doesn't want to attend the workshop with me?
It often happens that one partner may be interested in pursuing Sacred Sex and the other is not. You cannot force or coerce your partner into doing something they do not want to do. However, what frequently occurs is that as one partner learns mastery of this powerful force, the other sees the beneficial changes (and is the recipient of them sexually and in other ways!) and will gradually take a more active part. Remember this is a path for your spiritual growth, one that teaches we are all ultimately responsible for our own sexual fulfillment.

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What if I'm gay or lesbian?
Sacred Sex is just as valuable for gays and lesbians as it is for straight people. There are specific exercises to help increase the yang (masculine) energy for lesbian couples and the yin (feminine) energy for gay couples.

Question:
Just discovered your web site, and find it to be very informative and well presented. But I am wondering if you have ever included gay/lesbian couples in your workshops? If so, was it a successful experience overall , or would you suggest another tantric school.

Answer:
The core principle of Tantra is learning to use your sexual energy for spiritual awakening. This is the same for everyone. Although there are subtle differences based upon gender, I can see no differences based upon sexual orientation.

I think because much of the literature, videos and so on are oriented to heterosexuals that Tantra can be somewhat intimidating or a turnoff to many gays/lesbians We have in mind to create a web page with gay/lesbian resources but alas there is so much to do and so little time that we have not done it yet.

We have had the pleasure of working with some gays and lesbians and they found our sessions very rewarding. We would love to work with more.

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What if I'm not in a relationship right now?
Although one of the great joys of Sacred Sex is sharing the sexual ecstatic experience with another, Sacred Sex is first and foremost an individual spiritual journey. It is not necessary to have a partner to learn to harness and use your sexual energy. In the early stages of this work we all begin the process of mastering movement of our wild sexual energy through self-arousal. Some Sacred Sex practitioners choose to follow a path of celibacy. Ultimately the energy can be aroused and circulated with the power of thought - no "sexual activity" is required.

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Thanks to Pala for the use of her Sacred Sex FAQ's.

 

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